I just completed an unexpected journey. It lead to a new sense of humility, and an affirmation of self truth. I did this without meditation or candles or essential oils. The tools needed were the most unexpected of all. In fact, truth be told, I had been actively resisting one of them for many years; an act of arrogance and elitism. All I needed for this journey was my son, and, as I'm sure you've already guessed, the Fast & Furious canon.
In addition to all of the everything we've been mitigating, the daily recognition of and mitigation of stress has been a constant. I have two basic responses to stress. They are not novel or unusual; I either shut down or am very productive.
For the last three plus months I have had days of proud productivity. There are parts of my house that are so much more organized. My craft game is high, including many masks, a sweater, a Marvel themed backpack, an iPhone wallet case, an in process cross-stitch project, and I am dabbling with my first t-shirt quilt. I have been seduced by the cultish sourdough craze and have baked many boules as well as discard delicacies. And, I am currently writing two plays and a mystery novel.
Don't hate me yet.
I have balanced that productivity with an equal, if not slightly heavier ration of inertia, ranging from wandering aimlessly from room to room, sitting on the couch watching Friends or The Office again and again...and again, eating too much bread and discard delicacies, playing Wordscape and Candy Crush for just a lot a bit too long, re-charging my Kindle because this will be the night when I actually read something, and sitting on my front steps with nothing in my head other than wanting to be apart from everyone in my house.
I have been forgiving of myself, and relentless with myself, and self care has taken on many forms. Most days, regardless of whether it was productive or inert, I just try to get to 'after dinner,' when the tasks of the day are done and I can settle onto the couch with knitting and a glass of wine, or cross stitch and a glass of wine, or just my dog and a glass of wine, and watch something on TV and cede all responsibility. My favorite 'after dinner' distraction is when my younger son, now 20, asks if I want to watch a movie. I'm not sure how much longer he'll be asking, so my answer is always "Yes." There are many movies we both like(Star Wars, MCU, Bourne, Dark Knight Trilogy). There are some that I have introduced him to that he has adopted as favorites (Some Like It Hot, What We Do In The Shadows, The Birdcage, The Cornetto Trilogy, Sense & Sensibility, etc.), and some he has introduced to me (Your Name, Snowpiercer, Parasite, etc.). He is forever trying to get me to watch Train to Busan, a quest that will go unfulfilled as I fear Zombies, unless couched in comedy, more than just about anything ever forever and always. Then there are the movies that he watches with his dad and brother. The Fast and Furious canon has lived comfortably in this category, until last week.
He and I were browsing the Roku. He attempted and failed with Train to Busan again. He asked what I was in the mood for. I replied "something fun that doesn't require much of me." As he scrolled the offerings on HBO NOW, he also suggested revisiting the Star Wars movies, and then Fast Five scrolled by, and I said "I'd watch that. Have you seen that one?" He had, but not for awhile, and he inherited my ability to watch movies multiple times. My genetics game has a high bar.
We watched. I did cross-stitch. I was able to follow along and absorb missing pieces from previous installments. The cast was pretty diverse, with some women who kicked ass, as well as the requisite awful scenes of women showing off their asses at inexplicable street races. There was a satisfyingly absurd car chase at the end, and it turned out to be a pretty enjoyable heist movie, complete with The Rock delivering preposterous lines, Gal Gadot pre-Wonder Woman, and a car chase with a safe. It was a perfect distraction.
The next night we watched Fast & Furious 6. The one with the plane.
The next night was Fast 7, the one where they drive through buildings in mid air.
At this point it felt important to go back to the beginning, so we back tracked to the first movie The Fast and The Furious, not to be confused with the fourth movie Fast and Furious. I agree that title innovation is not a strong selling point of the series. The first movie is basically Point Break with cars. This is a massive assumption as I have never seen the original Point Break, but I did just read the plot summary.
Next was 2 Fast and 2 Furious. No Vin Diesel in this one, and basically seemed like an extended Miami Vice episode, but diverting nonetheless.
Tokyo Drift was made next, but its place in the chronological narrative is actually after Fast & Furious 6. Drift is a stand alone, with only a few moments that affect the entire canon's arc. It does include an MCU style sting at the end with the reappearance of Vin Diesel's Dom Toretto.
Next is Fast and Furious, which I'm going to call a reboot to the franchise. Our core relationship of Dom & Brian is re-kindled, and the theme of "you never walk out on family" is firmly re-established.
And that now brings us to Fate (or F8) of the Furious, with key roles by Charlize Theron and Helen Mirren, both post Oscar win. Yes friends, Helen & Charlize know how to have some fun. For those of you in the know, this is the one with the submarine.
As soon as F8 rolled credits, my son brought up the trailer for Fast and Furious 9. Charlize is back, so is Helen Mirren. And I will be too. No Rock or Jason Statham, however, as they were busy making the offshoot Hobbs and Shaw, which I watched before the Pandemic began.
I could also go into limited detail about behind the scenes feuds; the narrative significance of men's tank tops, skate shoes and Charlize's hairstyle; the family dinners that end most of the movies, the gentle way they handle Paul Walker's death, and the characters' ability to walk away from unfathomable car crashes pretty much unscathed.
As I write this I am plagued with the need to explain the reasoning for watching these movies, almost as if I need to apologize for it. But there is no grand cultural or personal denouement to this journey (see, I even used a fancy french word to legitimize my lack of legitimacy). What I take away most, what has created a lasting memory, is the shared coping. There seemed to be an understanding that we had burned through our go-to strategies for lowering stress and disrupting monotony. This new routine became something to look forward to, and, consequently, brought a little extra perk and purpose to the rest of the day. It was, I can only imagine, an unexpected experience for my son to share with with me, not as unexpected as say a stroll through the zombie canon of movies, but unexpected nonetheless. And it was a pleasant reminder to me to maybe be a little less of a snob, and that on days when I cannot handle bleak, when I need to take a few hours break from significance, survival of the moment is not always self and societal examination, it is a brief escape into turbo engines, nitros and the Rock sporting tank top undershirts in the work place. It is a time for the head, heart and soul to rest and reboot, and to welcome comfort and ease from surprising places.
We haven't decided which canon to tackle next, so I'm open for suggestions.
In addition to all of the everything we've been mitigating, the daily recognition of and mitigation of stress has been a constant. I have two basic responses to stress. They are not novel or unusual; I either shut down or am very productive.
For the last three plus months I have had days of proud productivity. There are parts of my house that are so much more organized. My craft game is high, including many masks, a sweater, a Marvel themed backpack, an iPhone wallet case, an in process cross-stitch project, and I am dabbling with my first t-shirt quilt. I have been seduced by the cultish sourdough craze and have baked many boules as well as discard delicacies. And, I am currently writing two plays and a mystery novel.
Don't hate me yet.
I have balanced that productivity with an equal, if not slightly heavier ration of inertia, ranging from wandering aimlessly from room to room, sitting on the couch watching Friends or The Office again and again...and again, eating too much bread and discard delicacies, playing Wordscape and Candy Crush for just a lot a bit too long, re-charging my Kindle because this will be the night when I actually read something, and sitting on my front steps with nothing in my head other than wanting to be apart from everyone in my house.
I have been forgiving of myself, and relentless with myself, and self care has taken on many forms. Most days, regardless of whether it was productive or inert, I just try to get to 'after dinner,' when the tasks of the day are done and I can settle onto the couch with knitting and a glass of wine, or cross stitch and a glass of wine, or just my dog and a glass of wine, and watch something on TV and cede all responsibility. My favorite 'after dinner' distraction is when my younger son, now 20, asks if I want to watch a movie. I'm not sure how much longer he'll be asking, so my answer is always "Yes." There are many movies we both like(Star Wars, MCU, Bourne, Dark Knight Trilogy). There are some that I have introduced him to that he has adopted as favorites (Some Like It Hot, What We Do In The Shadows, The Birdcage, The Cornetto Trilogy, Sense & Sensibility, etc.), and some he has introduced to me (Your Name, Snowpiercer, Parasite, etc.). He is forever trying to get me to watch Train to Busan, a quest that will go unfulfilled as I fear Zombies, unless couched in comedy, more than just about anything ever forever and always. Then there are the movies that he watches with his dad and brother. The Fast and Furious canon has lived comfortably in this category, until last week.
He and I were browsing the Roku. He attempted and failed with Train to Busan again. He asked what I was in the mood for. I replied "something fun that doesn't require much of me." As he scrolled the offerings on HBO NOW, he also suggested revisiting the Star Wars movies, and then Fast Five scrolled by, and I said "I'd watch that. Have you seen that one?" He had, but not for awhile, and he inherited my ability to watch movies multiple times. My genetics game has a high bar.
We watched. I did cross-stitch. I was able to follow along and absorb missing pieces from previous installments. The cast was pretty diverse, with some women who kicked ass, as well as the requisite awful scenes of women showing off their asses at inexplicable street races. There was a satisfyingly absurd car chase at the end, and it turned out to be a pretty enjoyable heist movie, complete with The Rock delivering preposterous lines, Gal Gadot pre-Wonder Woman, and a car chase with a safe. It was a perfect distraction.
The next night we watched Fast & Furious 6. The one with the plane.
The next night was Fast 7, the one where they drive through buildings in mid air.
At this point it felt important to go back to the beginning, so we back tracked to the first movie The Fast and The Furious, not to be confused with the fourth movie Fast and Furious. I agree that title innovation is not a strong selling point of the series. The first movie is basically Point Break with cars. This is a massive assumption as I have never seen the original Point Break, but I did just read the plot summary.
Next was 2 Fast and 2 Furious. No Vin Diesel in this one, and basically seemed like an extended Miami Vice episode, but diverting nonetheless.
Tokyo Drift was made next, but its place in the chronological narrative is actually after Fast & Furious 6. Drift is a stand alone, with only a few moments that affect the entire canon's arc. It does include an MCU style sting at the end with the reappearance of Vin Diesel's Dom Toretto.
Next is Fast and Furious, which I'm going to call a reboot to the franchise. Our core relationship of Dom & Brian is re-kindled, and the theme of "you never walk out on family" is firmly re-established.
And that now brings us to Fate (or F8) of the Furious, with key roles by Charlize Theron and Helen Mirren, both post Oscar win. Yes friends, Helen & Charlize know how to have some fun. For those of you in the know, this is the one with the submarine.
As soon as F8 rolled credits, my son brought up the trailer for Fast and Furious 9. Charlize is back, so is Helen Mirren. And I will be too. No Rock or Jason Statham, however, as they were busy making the offshoot Hobbs and Shaw, which I watched before the Pandemic began.
I could also go into limited detail about behind the scenes feuds; the narrative significance of men's tank tops, skate shoes and Charlize's hairstyle; the family dinners that end most of the movies, the gentle way they handle Paul Walker's death, and the characters' ability to walk away from unfathomable car crashes pretty much unscathed.
As I write this I am plagued with the need to explain the reasoning for watching these movies, almost as if I need to apologize for it. But there is no grand cultural or personal denouement to this journey (see, I even used a fancy french word to legitimize my lack of legitimacy). What I take away most, what has created a lasting memory, is the shared coping. There seemed to be an understanding that we had burned through our go-to strategies for lowering stress and disrupting monotony. This new routine became something to look forward to, and, consequently, brought a little extra perk and purpose to the rest of the day. It was, I can only imagine, an unexpected experience for my son to share with with me, not as unexpected as say a stroll through the zombie canon of movies, but unexpected nonetheless. And it was a pleasant reminder to me to maybe be a little less of a snob, and that on days when I cannot handle bleak, when I need to take a few hours break from significance, survival of the moment is not always self and societal examination, it is a brief escape into turbo engines, nitros and the Rock sporting tank top undershirts in the work place. It is a time for the head, heart and soul to rest and reboot, and to welcome comfort and ease from surprising places.
We haven't decided which canon to tackle next, so I'm open for suggestions.
